Greetings, programs. I thought I would take a moment and enumerate my personal guidelines for my Twitter account, specifically those governing who I follow or do not follow and why. These rules are not set in stone; they are merely guidelines, and though I usually keep to any guidelines I set for myself with almost obsessive tenacity, I reserve the right to transgress these guidelines at any time, for any reason, disclosed or not. I may transgress one guideline, but I shall never transgress all guidelines simultaneously.
Without further ado, I present my Twitter Following Policies.